Not half bad....

....for a Monday. I felt quite comfortable on this morning's five miler. TA little tired, yes, and not overly quick, but not terribly slow either. I got to bed at a decent hour last night, so five am wasn't too tough to deal with. It was too warm for the base layer that I donned, but the rain soon cooled me down. I was hungry. But that's not surprising, given that I ate shit yesterday. For the first time in months, I bought Diet Boke (my Dark Fizzy Master, as TMM used to call it) and I ate two whole tubs of Ben & Jerry's ice cream and no dinner. Not my finest hour, but I've been worse, and it's done now, so no point in repining.

Week ten of my marathon training is off to a god start, and Marathon Day, henceforth to be known as MD, is seven weeks today. Eek!

Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit.......

....less than fifty days to go! This is the countdown today on my Runkeeper account. It just seems like a few days ago when that had at least 120 days on it. But it's amazing how quickly the time goes in, not to mention all the training runs. Just a few weeks ago, it felt inconceivable that I would be able to run sixteen miles, and yet, that's exactly what I did yesterday morning. Sixteen miles all around Bangor.

When I told The Main Man where I'd been, he was a bit weirded out. Crawfordsburn, The Banks, Clandeboye Road, I circumnavigated the town. The mileage was a challenge, but once I was about five miles in, I got a rhythm going, and was able to shamble along. My main enemy yesterday was boredom. I was on my feet for three hours and thirty-eight minutes and it seemed a very long time. And I was acutely aware of the time passing. I wish I could zone out and just "flow" as my training book talks about. So far though, no joy, and much of yesterday's run was not fun due to the monotony. So next week, I think I'll go back to listening to the book.

This week's mid week runs are five, eight and five miles. That means getting up at 5am or 4.30am. This  is the most I will have to run mid week. It will be the case for five weeks. I can't believe I've go to this stage of the training. When I first saw the programme, I worried about these miles. It seemed like I couldn't possibly get up that early. Now, that's not such a big deal, and the miles themselves do not worry me. All that worries me now is the tedium. Even on the day itself, it's not the twenty-six point two that bothers me so much. I've done the training miles, I can do the marathon. I just need to focus a bit and remind myself again that I want to do this. But if I want to back out, I can do it at any time.

I can stop at any time. Honest!

It's that time of the week again when I start to worry about my Saturday long run. Sixteen miles tomorrow. I sure as Hell am not doing it round the park this week. As good an idea as I thought that was last week, I think it would kill me this week. But I'm working on my positivity (is that a real word, or did I just make it up?)

I don't have to do this, I've chosen to. I could stop at any time. So I'm going to shut the hell up and get on with it. I can just go out and enjoy running for the sake of running. It's getting lighter in the mornings, so I have more choices of places to run. I might try listening to the radio again, though that wasn't a great success yesterday, as there was a lot of static at times, and the only way to stop it was to have my hand on the earphone connection, that was acting as the aerial. I guess I don't really want to run like that for sixteen miles, never mind twenty-six!

My plan tomorrow is to run up the main road to Ballyrobert, turn right towards Crawsordsburn and run to Carnlea, then go through the trees there (if it's light by then) and hit the coastal path. By the time I get to Pickie, that should be ten miles. If I tack on my two normal three milers, or some of the ring road, that should see me finish. So a fair bit of the run will be new, and some will be picturesque. I hope to be done in three hours forty-five. Just one more distance increase to go in the training before the big day. I do sixteen miles three Saturdays in a row, then eighteen for two.

Bring on the Shambolic Shuffle!

Dietary adaptations

My paleo eating plan has been changed slightly for the past week, and I think it will remain so till the marathon is run. On Friday night, before my long run, I ate brown rice with my dinner, in an effort to start eating a bit more carbohydrate, then I used gels and sports drink on my run (pure sugar!) Last night, I also tried gluten free pasta with a paleo meatball and tomato sauce. It was okay, though if I'm going to use pasta, I might just go the whole hog and use whole wheat.

I must admit, I am feeling hungrier than normal this morning, and I wonder if it's the carbohydrate effect. It's such a long while since I had pasta of any sort, I'm not used to the feeling of massive fullness, then the emptiness afterwards anymore. Another thing is that I've become very spotty in the last few days, around my cheeks and neck, including a particularly attractive one on my upper lip. That could even be a cold sore, which thus far I haven't been prone to. I wonder if I'm run down, or not eating well enough. Or could it be down to the reintroduction of carby things? Interesting. I'll give it a week to see how it developes. It will be fun though, to tryto carb-load in the three days before the marathon :-) Then ice cream after. Oh yes! I shall enjoy that!

A new bum bag arrived today, one that should be big enough to hold my phone (which is masseeeve. A phablet in fact.) I think I will try listening to the radio on my long run this week, to see if that diverts me from the three and a half hours of being inside my own head (never a good place to be for such an extensive time :-D ) I'm also trying to find a nice route to distract me. It's a lot lighter earlier these mornings (thankfully I'm not as self conscious about running in the daylight anymore) so I might use the coastal path from Holywood. It's hilly in parts, but lovely. Maybe that'll take me out of myself a bit.

My latest marathon tome is Angry Jogger, by Angry Jogger. It's funny and full of foul language, right up my street. The writer is from Norn Irn too, a bonus which makes up for the fact that he's not a woman, which goes against my current marathon book policy. (Yeah, yeah, a very sexist policy. Get over it!) It's also about his first marathon attempt (in Belfast just a couple of years ago) and his gradual change from fat bastard to uber fit, ultra distance runner. By way of a bonus, his marathon training program is the very same book that I'm using, so I'm really looking forward to seeing how it pans out.

Seven and a half miles Baby!

You know something? Given I was quite tired at the start of yesterday's run, I expected more of the same today. And it wasn't like that at all. I started strong. I don't mean I was fast. I specifically wasn't fast. But I was comfortable. Instead of heading out to the ring road, as I'd intended, I did my two main 5k routes together, with a bit extra tagged on to the start and the end. And it felt good. Now, I was definitely tired by about 9k in, so the last 2.5k were not as comfortable, but it was totally manageable.

As much as I sometimes find the training schedule a big, scary commitment, I have to admit that I'm so much stronger than I was before I started. If I wasn't increasing my mileage so much, I'd be running my five km routes a few times a week, possibly trying Parkrun every now and again, but there's no way I'd be getting into running over ten miles in one fell swoop, never mind contemplating doing sixteen this weekend.

Feeling good and positive today :-)

Nervy? Moi?

I would never have thought of myself as the nervy type, but clearly as I get older, I am becoming more and more so. When I sing in public nowadays (it doesn't happen often) I get so nervous that I start to feel sleepy. It's weird. When I sang at a wedding recently, I could have dozed off in my pew half an hour before it started, and that was despite being so sick with nerves that I could have boked!

This same affliction is haunting me big time at the moment. I have occasional days when I manage to believe that the marathon and I will hit it off, but for the most part, I think it's going to kick my ass, and I get the jitters accordingly. I need a coping mechanism to get me through the next five weeks of long runs, and then the marathon itself. If I could just tune out my surroundings in some way, I think I'd be okay, but I'm painfully aware of every passing footstep most of the time. I get so bored, just running and running. Saturday just past there was a perfect example. I was running for three hours and fifteen minutes. That time is going to double on the day itself. Marathon day might not be so bad, as there'll be thousands of other runners, and thousands more spectators. But what about the three sixteen mile Saturdays, and two eighteen mile Saturdays? What's going to occupy my brain on those? Like I said, I need a coping mechanism. My training book talks about being in a low to medium state of arousal about it, but I'm well over that threshold, since it disturbs my sleep sometime and gives me butterflies.

Am I starting to think of backing out? I sort of am, but not really. I don't have to do this. I've chosen to do it. So I can back out anytime I want to. It would mean explaining to anyone who's sponsored me, but that alone wouldn't stop me. But I'd be so annoyed with myself if I gave up now. I'm less than two months away from having finished a marathon. I've done more than half the training time now. I've run 171 miles since the 10th Jan in pursuit of this goal. It would be daft to stop now. I just need to learn to think one day at a time. Stop thinking so far ahead!

This morning's run was four miles, and it wasn't overly fast, but it was relatively comfortable, given my legs were a bit tired still after Saturday's run. It was very windy, but no rain. Overall, I've been lucky with the weather. Tomorrow it's seven miles, so another very early start for a Tuesday. I really must try to go to bed early tonight!

Bluhhhh....

....that's what I think of energy gels, at least the ones I tried today. It was my first time using them, and I was not expecting them to taste as if I was eating a tablespoon of runny jam! I say again,"Bluhhh!" The first hit was fresh and fruity, but immediately after, it tasted and felt sickly. I used a few with caffeine and a couple without. The instructions suggested two or three an hour, so I had one after the first half hour, then one every half hour after. I used six in the whole run. I did fourteen miles, and it took me three hours and fifteen minutes. I do not know what difference they made, along with the two litres of replacement fluid that I used, but they must have done something, given that they amounted to over 500 calories of carbohydrate. I felt really tired by mile ten, so the last four miles were tough, I was bored and fed up. But I just kept telling myself, "Only four more miles," or, "Less than five kilometers to go now." It would probably have felt a lot worse without the gels, so I don't think the taste and texture would stop me using them again. I might have a go at a different brand though.

Because of my fear of needing the loo, I decided not to run seven miles out, and seven miles back, or to run a seven mile loop of the ring road, then run it in reverse, as I'd originally thought I might. I thought I'd stay close to home, run a few laps of the park, then head out to the ring road for the last half. As it turned out, I ran the whole thing in the park. Fourteen laps, the same as the laps of the Parkrun. I ran nearly five Parkruns! See how thick the red line is in the map? That's me going round FOURTEEN TIMES in that area!

Did it add to my boredom? I'm not sure. I didn't use the audio book, as I was really trying to get into that focused state that my book talks about. I was trying to think just of the running. But I came in and out of my concentration. And I reached no sort of running nirvana. So that deserves another,"Bluhhhh!"

At least when I finally finished running this week, I didn't feel as if I was going to die. And while my legs are stiff, they aren't actually as bad as they have been in the past. Also, I ran the whole thing with no plasters on my feet at all. That's an improvement. And sometimes, my toes weren't scrunched up. All by themselves. Excellent.

I didn't eat as much shite this week afterwards as I did last week, so my stomach is more settled than it was then. I have used every extra calorie that I earned. But hey, it was a long run, I  used a lot of energy. I needed to replenish. (That sounds like a decent excuse. I  like it. Think I'll use it after the marathon so I can have  lots of ice cream)